My daughter went with her friend to get her nails done because she's just like mama- mani/pedi's can cure pretty much everything. Then, when she realized I probably wouldn't be getting out of bed for many hours, she spent the day at her friend's camp- after deeming me the lamest mom alive.
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| Surprise kid...not even close. |
Necessary background info that makes this blog more understandable and thus meaningful to you, the reader:
I'm not the girl that calls. I don't beg.
I take all my feelings and shove them waaaayy down inside where they should be. I'm very Kennedy in that way. (And in the way that I'm super pretty.) When my feelings do bubble over, they take on the form of anger. The last time I broke up with a long term guy I took a pickaxe to his motorcycle. Granted, I didn't exactly go out like Jackie O. on that one but it was kinda justified and if you think about it, I still resemble a Kennedy. Only it was Ted Kennedy. Who "accidentally" drove that chick into a lake. Probably because they'd just broken up.
Facts that do nothing to make things more understandable to you but serve solely to make me feel good:
I'm smart and know a ridiculous amount of trivia, which is cool. I'm very, very good at Uno. I have almost as much confidence as I have swagger.
I'm not the girl that calls. I don't beg.
I take all my feelings and shove them waaaayy down inside where they should be. I'm very Kennedy in that way. (And in the way that I'm super pretty.) When my feelings do bubble over, they take on the form of anger. The last time I broke up with a long term guy I took a pickaxe to his motorcycle. Granted, I didn't exactly go out like Jackie O. on that one but it was kinda justified and if you think about it, I still resemble a Kennedy. Only it was Ted Kennedy. Who "accidentally" drove that chick into a lake. Probably because they'd just broken up.
Facts that do nothing to make things more understandable to you but serve solely to make me feel good:
I'm smart and know a ridiculous amount of trivia, which is cool. I'm very, very good at Uno. I have almost as much confidence as I have swagger.
After surveying my room, I realized that I should be ashamed at how much I'd cried over the last few days. And that made me think. If I wasn't over it, then he couldn't possibly be over it. I knew for a fact that I should call him and make things work. Which is exactly how I knew that I shouldn't call him and make things work. Because my gut instinct is always wrong. Always.
Seriously, always.
So instead, I thought of the very best ways to screw Assface over. After all, everything of his was still at our house. He only took a bag of stuff with him to house-sit before officially moving out. I have his credit cards, an old license, tax documents, ex-girlfriend pictures he thinks I don't know about, all his HD porn, his old cell phone with all his contacts, all his precious hockey memorabilia, work forms...
Seriously, I could ruin this kid.
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| Cry it out, bitch. You're fucked. And way less pretty than this guy. |
